Sunday, November 25, 2012

Loving It


Darkness is falling around this little house we are occupying for these weeks. The electricity is not back on, so the house slips into the inkiness. Music pours out of the i-pod and the $5 speakers we bought on a whim.   We all squeal with delight as kAkA brings an old fashioned lantern and hangs it on the tree outside the kitchen window.  He probably thinks we are the oddest people.  The three candles I could find in the house are lit on the island.  They illminate the potatoes I peel for supper.
 
A.P. bounces Baby Zar on his knee as he helps Little t put together a puzzle.  They both wear headlights. They giggle together about a piece that found it’s home before resuming their conversation.  The very serious matter of peeing in the toilet and ‘big boy unnies’ and a new bike are at hand.  A.P. says we will go broke if we continue to buy diapers in this land, so a bike (as a reward for potty training) would be cheaper in the long run.

Suddenly the bulb on the outside wall flicks on – a signal of restored power, but the house continues to be enveloped in darkeness. In the words of A.P. ‘this isn’t our first rodeo', so when the power went off last night we turned all of the lights off before going to bed.  The sweetness of returning power is lessened when the glare of lights left on wakes you up in the middle of the night!

I reach for the switch and then stop. My little family…my world…cozy and happy together by candelight. Why invade on this memory with a gleaming bulb?  So I return to my potatoes with a smile plastered across my face. 

The sweetness of the momet is not lost of me and I mentally take note of it.  I want to savor it for the hard days, the heartbreaking days, the insane days. But in the moment, the joy that threatens to burst through is so so good! 

I am so humbled by the blessing of the Father. Here I am; living my dream of life in a foreign land, a good man to lead me and babies to love. It just doesn’t get any better than that. 

***Maybe this incident feels especially special given the uncertainty of what is next for us and the grieving we are doing over what we are being asked to let go of in these days. I have tried to write about this, but have failed until now.  Here is a good post A.P. wrote about it:  http://positivechangebythepeople.blogspot.com/2012/11/i-dont-cry-but-if-i-did-now-would-be.html***

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